Search Results for: blog marriage fights

Evil Spirits and Sword Fights: More Wedding Tradition Origins

Today I want to share some of my favorite origins behind wedding traditions. The traditions themselves aren’t my favorites, but I’m very tickled by their roots. These traditions have to do with the wedding party and originated in medieval Europe. It’s easy enough to imagine why a bride is surrounded by bridesmaids; they often spent the night with the bride before her wedding to make sure that she wasn’t visited by any men before becoming a wife. But that’s not the only reason for their presence. Centuries ago brides and their maids all dressed alike (which is why bridesmaids still … Continue reading →

Blundering into Fights — And Getting Back Out

Do you ever sometimes feel like you’ve somehow stumbled into a fight and are not sure how it happened? When we go looking to pick fights we know what we’re up to, but sometimes it seems like all of a sudden we’re fighting with someone and we’re not exactly sure how it happened. This can happen between any two people but it’s certainly common in a marriage, just given that married couples are two people who spend so much time together. The silver lining of picked fights is that, although when we go looking to start one we’re not exactly … Continue reading →

ACLU Fights Michigan Domestic Partner Health Insurance Ban

Michigan recently passed a law that prevents public entities from providing health insurance for the same-sex domestic partners of employees. The ACLU is fighting this law on behalf of school teachers and city and county workers whose domestic partners will lose their health insurance coverage as a result of this law. It has become a controversial topic. Should employees of public institutions, (such as teachers, postal workers, and other city or county workers), be allowed to have their domestic partners covered under the employee’s health insurance? Every state in America legally recognizes the marriages of couples who are the opposite-sex … Continue reading →

Special Needs Children and Your Marriage

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The divorce rate is high in this country – over 50%. That’s huge. That’s more than half of the weddings you have been to and half of the happy couples you have celebrated with. Although statistics differ, the divorce rate is even higher for couples who have children with special needs. And I completely understand why. We head into marriage with big dreams, goals and ideas of how it will be. We picture this perfect life with these perfect kids. We may expect some bumps along the way, but when your child is sick, disabled, or challenged in anyway, it … Continue reading →

Marriage Essentials

Do you want to know four essentials for a good marriage? Here they are: Encouragement This quality cannot be stressed enough. One of our adult offspring once said, ‘you and Dad always encouraged me in whatever I did. You made me believe I could do anything I set my mind to.’ While I was pleased to hear that, I also thought that’s the sort of encouragement each of us needs to be for our spouse. We need to be behind them in whatever they do encouraging them every step of the way, whether it’s changing jobs or learning a new … Continue reading →

Overcoming a Crisis in Marriage

The statistics for a divorce after a crisis in your life are overwhelming. A crisis, whether it is an internal conflict such as infidelity or something outside of your control, such as a death in the family, this is the time when your marriage may be most vulnerable. Here is some advice on how you can survive the crisis and make your marriage even stronger. Someone once told me that a crisis in life is just like a hurricane. It is large, loud, very scary and can result in injury or death. I think this is a good comparison. Hurricanes … Continue reading →

Divorcing Couple Fights Over Kidney

When conflict arises in a marriage, it sometimes leads to divorce proceedings which then leads to more conflict. For one New York couple, the fighting stems not over a home or other visible possessions, but over a kidney. Back in 2001, Dr. Richard Batista donated one of his kidneys to his wife, Dawnell. Now, these many years later, he wants it back. The wife filed for divorce in 2005, and while the divorce is still yet to be finalized, the kidney is still on the list of disputes. Dr. Batista says that in lieu of the kidney, he would accept … Continue reading →

“Right Fighters” = Marriage Saboteurs

Yesterday I talked about how, among other things, the season for fighting is upon us. I also ended the article saying I’d examine some ways to fight fairly to ensure any fights you might have this holiday season are good ones, not just big ones –or, more importantly, rehashed ones. I’m actually going to start off by telling you a way not to fight. It has to do with the following quote and an article I wrote several months back about “Right Fighters”, a term I picked up from Dr. Phil. Attachment to being right creates suffering. When you have … Continue reading →

Unrealistic Marriage Expectations

When we first get married, we have a certain set of expectations that come with us into the union. The bride has her set, the husband has his set, and the in-laws have theirs as well. Some of these expectations will be met, and many of them won’t. Let’s discuss some of these expectations. 1. The Myth: Many of us believe that temple marriage is the golden key to unlock all our marriage treasures and that nothing can befall us once we’ve been sealed. The Truth: the temple gives us the ability to be together forever, if we live righteously … Continue reading →

Mending Marriage Miscommunications

Yesterday was pretty typical in the life of a young Mormon mommy. I spent all my time breaking up fights, trying not to cry as mess after mess was cleaned up (by me) and recreated (by the children). By the time my husband got home, I was ready for a time-out (for me). I went into the bedroom and treated myself to a book. A couple of hours later, my husband came in. He’d put the children to bed, the house was quiet, and I felt much refreshed. I thanked him for the wonderful reprieve, then stood up to grab … Continue reading →